My Life, A Cocktail

Sitting in the dark, in one corner of my bed, with my darling baby sleeping soundly beside me, I slowly relish one of my all time favorites - the Rocky Road ice cream.  Yes, it has come to this. This is all the solitude and me-time that I can manage these days. But I am making every bite count!

Tonight's the kind of lonely night that despite the family next to you, there feels a void that is inside of you. You feel like pouring your heart out, if only someone would listen. You feel like listening to their share of truth, if only they could come out in the open. Tonight's the kind of night where dreams have no bounds, that despite the rules of society, your mind wanders into unthinkable terrirtories. You feel free, if only you could fathom freedom. You want to set free, if only they could value your generosity. Tonight's the kind of night that needs that long lost friend. To catch up under starry nights on a staircase or over a cup of coffee.

Life was whooshing past me. I stood still like a bystander, unaffected by what was around me. I splurged on pretentious happiness and would cry bland tears. Until the day you came into my life. I live life clinging to every moment before it can slip away. I can never run out of things to do now, I can never imagine what's it's like to be bored. I can see other people in the eye and genuinely know how they feel. I can stand upright with pride because I know I am doing it right. You have completed me in ways I had never imagined anyone could. To my sweetest little doll Kavya!

One idly vada, one ghee masala dosa, one chai and one rainbow, for here, please! That was our order this morning for breakfast. Sitting by the window, in this little hole in the wall type restaurant named quite aptly as the “Madurai Idli Kadai”, I tore apart pieces of the dosa smothered in ghee, dipped it into fresh coconut chutney and relished, with a sip of chai, the pouring rain and the beautiful rainbow outside. It is my kinda bliss. These are the kind of moments when I am sans any worries, sans any stress. While the rainbow played peek-a-boo with the clouds, I couldn’t help but think about the transient nature of life. Happiness was right here, right now, I wanted to bottle it up and keep drinking it, never wanting it to end. Until it finally did, just  like my hot piping chai. It is in the want of such moments, that we all live our lives. Everything else is insignificant. 

Togetherness may be transient, may even be an illusion. But it is a beautiful thing. Life is inherently boring. Loneliness in inevitable. But when life gives you the option of togetherness, I don’t see any point ignoring it. Be happy, be together. 

Yes, there is such a thing!!! Super delicious. @ Cafe Central at the Westfiedl Valleyfair mall in Santa Clara.

I was nearing the end of this book that I am reading, and a phrase about Turkish coffee and it’s aroma made me linger. Immediately and unknowingly, I was taking a deep breath and my mind was filled with the aroma of strong freshly ground coffee. I was transported to the crowded lanes of Manama, walking hand in hand with my dad, into this little coffee shop in the corner. It was the kind of shop that boasted several varieties of coffee grounds from the middle east - Turkish, Arabic, Persian. While my dad and mom would decide on which one to get, and wait for them to be roasted, me and my sister would greedily admire the huge baskets of candy wrapped in shiny foil papers of all colors. The store owner would notice and very fondly, call out to us and hand us a few pieces of candy. We would accept in delight. There are some memories that no matter how old, stay with you. They let you travel and relive the bygones as fresh as the present. Oh, you beautiful mind!