My Life, A Cocktail

I have memories from childhood days. Dusherra was 10 fun filled days. It would start with the arrangement of kolu, and inviting neighbors and relatives to our home for vethala pakku. Every evening, there would a yummy snack for prasadam. Maamis and kids would sing beautiful carnatic melodies. Of course, we would get to go to other houses and marvel at their kolu. And the 10 days would end with the fireworks from the huge Ravana statue in the park. Given the chance, I took it. My anni lent me toys for the kolu. With the little place I have in my kitchen counter slab, I arranged the toys. It was colorful. I could have been without it, I could have just let it pass by. I am glad I didn’t. It’s a choice we make. Let’s make festivals matter.

I just finished reading ‘The Witch of Portobello’ by Paulo Coelho. Its not his greatest of works, there are other books I have liked better (Alchemist, Veronika decides to die, Eleven Minutes), but it’s a good read. If asked to sum up the book, its about “Love”. The philosophy being “Love is”. Reminds me of those child day cartoon strips on the newspaper, called Love is. Though the cartoon would always complete that sentence. The book doesn’t. Paulo Coelho says “Love is”. An end in itself. No descriptions, no definitions. Love is. In the skies, in the waters, in the air, in our heads, existing without logic. Without caring if its reciprocated, without caring for commitment, without caring for uncertainty, without caring for time. Love simply is.

Yet again, I have a problem in my head to solve. It’s funny how every Tuesday evening I go to my music class, expecting to relieve stress and relax, and do that one thing I can never get tired of, sing. And almost every Tuesday, I am awarded with something interesting. A thought, a process, a perspective or a question. “What is good music?” As simple as the question sounds, my mind instantly came up with a simple answer. “There is no such thing as good music. All music is good.” As I convinced myself of my answer, there were varied reactions from the others. Some were dumbstruck by the question, some other questioned the question. “Good music probably depends on various parameters like rhythm, diction, melody and so on. How can anyone quantify these parameters?” Yet others based their answers solely on perspective. “I like what I like. Coz that’s me. Others don’t like what I like, and I don’t necessarily like what others like.” My mind soared…. “How can music be bad? Maybe it can, I do...

Inspiration finds it way to us, if only we want to be inspired. Its amazing how events, emotions, circumstances, people, conversations, art, music, and so many other things can inspire you to do things related or not. I went to this concert yesterday. It was a casual Hindustani classical music concert by Shri. Shaunak Abhisheki. For those who don’t know him, he’s the son of Shri. Jitendra Abhisheki. Ok, never mind. The point being, I went to this concert, and loved it. He sang an amazing bandish, a khayal, a naatya sangeeth, among other ragas. The day ended perfectly with a mesmerizing bhajan. I enjoy music, and anyone who can sing well can have me impressed. And with every great performance, I sense this energy, that urges me to move ahead, do things I have always wanted to do, achieve things I have wanted to achieve. This energy is not new to me. It happens to me now and then. And I love it when it happens. A couple of months ago, I was pushed to join music classes. The music classes...

A lot of times in life we come across problems, thoughts, processes, protocols that we don’t quite agree with. At the same time, the society abides by them, and you are firmly asked to comply. The mind offers resistance, and we either succumb to our resistance or to the external pressure. Whichever path we choose, the resistance continues to remain. Resistance, a lot of times, hinders learning. Not all things in life are as straight forward as object oriented programming or E-R diagrams. Not a lot of people see sense in objects and classes when they first begin to learn OOPs. But they are forced through the learning process, whether they agree with the concepts or not. It is when the learning gets much deeper that you start recognizing the finer aspects, understand and appreciate objects and their attributes and their functionality. What I am trying to say here is, the basic components in any theory may not be attractive, may not be convincing, but where they fit in the whole model is ...

Yes, I am learning music. Again. Finally. Some interesting conversations that happened in yesterday’s class. I asked, “How can anyone identify the Sur involved in a piece of music, when the concept of Sur is totally relative?” He told me it is one of the most difficult problems in music. People consider the Tanpura as some sort of standard, but it isn’t completely accurate. The solution is being researched, but he said he believed it was one of those non-computable problems. Reminded me of the good great Halting Problem. We were trying to sing different surs in random order. Ofcourse, we faltered. He said, “Understand the problem statement. And then strategize.” We saw we could easily break down the random order into pieces we had already learnt and that made it so much easier to sing. Association and Disassociation. I have always believed, Science, Religion, Spirituality, Art, Music, all these weren’t created to individually exist. They all support each other in some way or the other.

It’s not a movie that people would flock to watch. No, it has no glitz, no glamour. It is possibly the kind of movie you pick up, when you’ve roamed the aisles of the video shop for too long, and are angry and frustrated with the illusion of too much choice. You don’t want to return empty handed after having spent so long, so you just pick up ‘some’ damn movie. The movie times back to the early 19th century and is about this man who waits for the girl he loves. No big deal, huh? Well, he falls in love in his twenties, and waits till about the time he is 70 years old, he waits for her husband to die to be with her again. Come on, no one can be that stupid, isn’t it a plain waste of one’s life, you may want to ask. Yes, it seemed stupid at first to me too. And then from that secret corner of my brain, a thought long thought about, cast aside only coz it never completely made sense, presented itself, this time with a new dress of reason, in a new form. It said to me, “People are different...